Seventeen years ago today, about this time of the early morning, my daughter Anna was killed. Our daughter. Megan’s sister. Dorothy’s granddaughter. PK and Gloria’s granddaughter. Paul and Kathy’s niece. Christopher and Clara, Andrew, Amanda and Melissa’s cousin. The twins … Continue reading
I feel like I should write something about Gloria. Today is the first anniversary of her death. It was a good death – no, not a good death, a good dying. Her family was gathered around her. She was alert … Continue reading
The number of people I remember on All Saints’ Day continues to grow. It is the burden of life. My father, 96, read me the names of those being remembered in his church. Again and again the names he read … Continue reading
It’s hard to describe what happened to me at the altar during the prayers of the church, yesterday. Typical Lutheran congregations don’t have a shared vocabulary for discussing personal spiritual experiences. Other communities of which I have been a part find it easier to say that God spoke to them. Continue reading
Tomorrow would have been my daughter’s 36th birthday. It snuck up in me, busy as I’ve been. But a look at the calendar today, and that number 13 jumped out. Is it really May already? Are we here again? What … Continue reading
We are creatures who think in stories. Confusion and anxiety reign when we can’t figure out the story line. It locates us. It gives meaning to our past, shapes our understanding of the present and gives direction for the future. Continue reading
It’s not possible to remember everything. With time memories slip away. Fragments remain. And the love remains. At least, that’s what should remain. I am heartened by those who turn their sorrow into kindness. I am saddened by those who turn it into bitterness. But I understand, most of us have stood at one time or another at that fork in the road where those two paths diverge Continue reading
16 years ago tomorrow my 19 year old daughter and two of her friends were killed by a driver who had been drinking. Though Anna and her friends had been driving responsibly, traveling the speed limit, wearing their seat belts, … Continue reading
Tomorrow is Anna’s 35th birthday. Hard to imagine. She is locked forever now at 19. Her smile. Her laugh. Her brilliant eyes. The daisies in her hair, plucked from the wildflowers on her way to school. Her warmth. Her depth of spirit. Her passion for dance and theater and the life of the Spirit. Continue reading
After teeth had been brushed and a story read, after prayers had been said and goodnight kisses given, I would blow softly into Anna’s ears: once to blow out bad dreams, and then again to blow in good dreams. I … Continue reading
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