Category Archives: Grief

“I kept that promise.”

It’s hard to describe what happened to me at the altar during the prayers of the church, yesterday. Typical Lutheran congregations don’t have a shared vocabulary for discussing personal spiritual experiences. Other communities of which I have been a part find it easier to say that God spoke to them. Continue reading

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Tomorrow

Tomorrow would have been my daughter’s 36th birthday. It snuck up in me, busy as I’ve been. But a look at the calendar today, and that number 13 jumped out. Is it really May already? Are we here again? What … Continue reading

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Let us pray for wisdom

It’s not possible to remember everything. With time memories slip away. Fragments remain. And the love remains. At least, that’s what should remain. I am heartened by those who turn their sorrow into kindness. I am saddened by those who turn it into bitterness. But I understand, most of us have stood at one time or another at that fork in the road where those two paths diverge Continue reading

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An eternal kindness

There is room in the heart of God for us all. Continue reading

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It’s not simple

I am not the kind of person who can give simple answers. I have heard them. I have heard people say them to one another. I have heard them say them to me. “She’s with God now.” And this is true. This is profoundly true. It is the heart of what we come together to do on this day – to symbolically entrust Kerstin into the arms of God. But it is not simple. Continue reading

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Remembering the day

I was alone on campus when the phone call came. My dad had been trying to reach me, but there was only one phone for the two corridors on my side of the floor in the freshman dorm, and I … Continue reading

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This week I remember my brother

This week I remember my brother. It’s been a long time, now. 46 years. But the wound remains. Not so raw, but still tender. Continue reading

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I just wish that I could hear

Tomorrow is Anna’s 35th birthday. Hard to imagine. She is locked forever now at 19. Her smile. Her laugh. Her brilliant eyes. The daisies in her hair, plucked from the wildflowers on her way to school. Her warmth. Her depth of spirit. Her passion for dance and theater and the life of the Spirit. Continue reading

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Floodwaters

A young man in the parish died on or shortly after Easter. He was 26. I met with his parents today. Faith seems like such a thin thread in the midst of such anguish. Continue reading

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Sleepless

After teeth had been brushed and a story read, after prayers had been said and goodnight kisses given, I would blow softly into Anna’s ears: once to blow out bad dreams, and then again to blow in good dreams. I … Continue reading

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